started off the season righttt. too bad i barely got pt. its like whats the point of trying so hard in practice and when it comes down to it you're still not gonna be getting pt. i know that i will never be as good as ash' or des' cuz they are just freaking raw. i dont even wanna consider myself a middle anymore. i dont even know what i am on the team. i feel like if des' or ash' is not there to play middle i'm just back up and then i fuck up and then its all my fault and i just think that if they were there this wouldn't have happened. i feel like my confidence level hella downgraded. and its also like i dont even feel like i make a difference in the team so it doesnt matter if i'm there or not.. i dont want it to seem like i dont care about the team if they win or not but its hard to be hella happy and shit on the bench when you dont even get to play. or when they're down you dont even get a chance to help them cuz you're on the freaking bench. sorry for being emo.
way to not even talk to me anymore. i knew this would happen but you just never believed me. get so fucking caught up with shit and forget about everything else. its annoying as fck
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